I was bullied...But do I have to be a VICTIM??
If you’re getting bullied, the first reaction you will probably have is to feel like you’re a victim with no power. You will probably also think there’s something wrong with you and wish that you were different so that this wasn’t happening.
These are very understandable and normal reactions to have when you’re being singled out and picked on cruelly and repeatedly!
But you actually don’t have to respond this way.
When something awful is happening, you have a choice to either see yourself as a powerless victim, or to see yourself as the hero of your own life story. Even though it may seem impossible, you CAN change the situation you are in.
1. Pause. Take a deep breath.
2. Do something that you love that brings you joy.
3. Talk to a friend or therapist or someone you trust about what you’re going through.
4. Listen to them when they tell you that it’s NOT YOUR FAULT.
5. Think about WHY the bully is doing this – what kind of pain are they feeling that would make them act so cruelly? (unkind actions ALWAYS come from pain).
6. Write down a list of all the possible responses you could have and what the outcome of each would be. Eg. you could confront them, ignore them, turn their taunting into a joke etc.
7. Practice doing something off your list every time the bullying happens.
8. Notice how you feel when you are focused on YOUR response and YOUR actions rather than THEIRS.
Congratulations, you’re not a victim!
By going through these steps, you have officially taken your power back…the bullying is now something you are EXPERIENCING, rather than something that is OWNING you and dictating how you feel about yourself.
Bullying sucks. It’s painful and overwhelming and devastating. But if you remember your own power in the situation, ANYTHING hard can be turned into something that you use to become more of who you want to be!
For a real life example of this, check out my Youtube video featuring the fabulous 17-year-old model and actress Alaya Walton sharing how her experiences of bullying helped her find her passion for acting